Sibling Rivalry II: Rematch

Did you miss me? Sorry to have kept you without bout coverage the last month or so, but I’m back now so let’s talk derby!

The Rose City Rollers home teams took on the Rat City Rollergirls‘ home teams in round two of the Sibling Rivalry. Four mini-bouts took place at the Memorial Coliseum on April 23rd in front of 5,000 or so fans. It. Was. Awesome.

Break Neck Betties 65 Derby Liberation Front 51

The badass ladies in red took revenge upon the derby revolutionaries from up north in round two of the Sibling Rivalry. Last time, Derby Liberation Front beat the Break Neck Betties 92-46 at Key Arena. This time at the Memorial Coliseum, the Betties came out strong, building very efficient walls to contain the DLF jammers.

In fact, the Betties got lead jammer status for the first six jams, running up the score 22-0. Lightning-fast jammers, Soulfearic Acid and Joyride sliced through DLF’s pack defense like butter.

Somewhere around jam #8 or #9, DLF upped the intensity in the pack and managed to keep the Betties jammer contained long enough for Ann R. Kissed to get lead jam and score 14 points. DLF continued to play good “D” by building walls at the back and front of the pack. Unfortunately for them, the Betties jammers were able to fight through those walls to continue to put points on the board.

DLF began to close the gap in the final minutes and even had a chance to tie or win in the last jam, but Soulfearic Acid jumped out as lead jammer and called it off before DLF had a chance to make up the difference.

The Derby Liberation Front put up a good fight, but in the end the Betties overpowered them. And that was without the recently-retired powerhouse blockers Marollin’ Monroe and Barbahella!

Joyride kicked ass and took names against DLF. (Photo by Axle Adams)

I was very impressed by Joyride’s jamming abilities in this bout. I knew she was a very skilled skater with good agility and speed, but her skills have definitely improved with the continued practice and bouting for the travel team. Against DLF, Joyride not only proved to have great footwork, but she also showed that she has great strength and perseverance by fighting through the tough DLF four-walls.

And of course, Acid did a phenomenal job jamming, as usual. We all know Acid is pretty much a rockstar on the track, but I don’t think I’ve sung her praises enough. She did a great job of juking and jiving to sneak around opposing blockers. She also does a fantastic job of working the inside line of the track to get through the pack. I saw her jump the apex at least once, but I probably missed a few more (I was drinking PBR…).

Guns N Rollers 40 Throttle Rockets 84

Although the Guns N Rollers suffered a 40+ loss in the rematch against the Throttle Rockets, it was not quite the 96-27 shellacking that happened in the first bout up north. This improvement is likely due to the increased practice time that GnR has had with one another to work on fine-tuning their skills as well as the new team additions in Itzo EZ, Untamed Shrew, Artemis Foulmouth, and Tyger Bomb. Oh, and having Blood Clottia and Smack Ya Sideways as guest skaters didn’t hurt either.

Scald Eagle lined up for the first jam, and although she didn’t get lead jammer status, she caught up to and passed TR jammer Valtron 3000 after being behind a good three or four strides, forcing Valtron to call off the jam before either skater could score any points. The Throttle Rockets were able to make up for the first jam snafu by taking advantage of a power jam situation in jam #3 when Havana Good Time got sent to the box for a major track cut, bringing the score to 19-4 in favor of TR.

A 10-point jam from Scald right after that brought GnR within five points, but the Throttle Rockets upped their game and prevented the butt-rockers from scoring points in the next three jams. GnR seemed to have issues playing cohesive pack defense, and helping their jammer get through. But let’s be honest. With big, solid TR blockers like Killah Kelly, Hard Cora, Betty Ford Galaxy, and Sirius Smack it’s gonna be difficult to play good pack defense without getting knocked on your ass a few or fifty times.

Awnry O'Hulligan, Juvie Hall, and Sugar N' Vice spending time in the penalty box. (Photo by Axle Adams)

It also didn’t help that GnR skaters were racking up penalties left and right. Several times I saw a GnR jammer go to the box for a major penalty, allowing TR jammers such as Missile America and Primp Daddy (who was guest skating under the name Fighty Almighty) to effortlessly run up the score.

Regardless of the  outcome, I was excited to see GnR play. They are constantly improving and I think it’s awesome to see the growth of individual skaters. Their roster is chock full of raw talent, and it won’t be long till we see these new skaters on the travel team. Hell, Scald Eagle is already on the Wheels of Justice (seriously, who didn’t see that coming?), Havana Good Time is on Axles of Annihilation, and rumor has it that wait-listed travel team skaters (which includes Roller Eclipse and possibly some other GnR skaters?) get to travel to Denver next weekend to play for AoA.

Haters gonna hate, but in the mean time these badass bitches will continue to improve and  dominate with their hardcore, rock-and-roll attitudes. \m/ \m/

Heartless Heathers 23 Grave Danger 88

Okay, I’m gonna come right out and say it. I was not expecting this bout to be the ass-kicking it was. In the first match-up, the Heathers won by six points in an overtime jam, so I was hoping for the same kind of intense, keep-you-on-the-edge-of-your-seat bout. Wrong.

Now, the Heartless Heathers were missing White Flight, their best jammer (in my opinion), and Twat Rocket injured herself that morning (she was at the bout and walking around on the sidelines, so it doesn’t appear too severe). And Grave Danger has a solid team filled with all-star skaters. But the Heathers are overflowing with talent, and I’m sure I’m not the only one who expected a little more for them.

But shit happens. Skaters and teams have off nights. My high school basketball coach once told me, “Some nights you just can’t piss a drop.” The same thing happened to the Heathers. They had all the tools necessary to dominate, but they just couldn’t get it together. It’s done and over with, and I’m sure they’ve learned their lesson. But for the sake of this blog post I’ll fill you in on the details, however painful it may be to read them.

Grave Danger held the Heathers scoreless for seven jams. Seven. Jams. That right there should tell you 1) how “off” some of the HH skaters were and 2) how amazing the Grave Danger blockers are.

Mercy was the one to put the Heathers on the board with three points in jam #8, but it wasn’t until jam #11 when Baccha Nailya, one of the new badass rookie skaters, was jamming that the Heathers broke double digits.

Mercy demonstrated solid blocking against Grave Danger. (Photo by Axle Adams)

I noticed that Sol Train jammed a lot that night. Perhaps it’s because of the absence of White Flight and Twat Rocket, or maybe because she does such a great job of muscling her way past opposing blockers. I also noticed that a couple skaters, Frenchie and Mercy, played in back to back jams a few times.

Speaking of Mercy, that woman is a beast on the track. She is incredibly versatile. She’s fierce in the pack, and she jams like nobody’s business. Her only issue seems to be racking up too many penalties and spending too much time in the box.

Anyway, the Heathers blockers were unable to contain Grave Danger jammers such as Carmen Getsome, ReAnimateHer, and Georgia O’Grief, and the HH jammers couldn’t get through the solid Grave Danger pack defense to score enough points. The end.

High Rollers 60 Sockit Wenches 29

The flashy ladies in green and gold had no problem beating the Sockit Wenches for the second time. Although the Sockit Wenches were down many rostered players due to injuries and sickness, the High Rollers came out ready to kick some ass. Don’t let the SW roster shortage fool you too much, though. There were guest skaters from other RCRG teams for this bout, such as Domino Scarvy, Primp Daddy, Killah Kelly, and ReAnimateHer.

The High Rollers‘ pack defense looked pretty damn solid that night. They had great communication and their strategy seemed well-executed.

The jam rotation for HRMF (High Rollers Mother F**kers, for those of you who are out of the loop) consisted mostly of Wreck Deckard, Illegally Blonde, Napoleon Blownapart!, and Honey Hellfire, and they were all killing it on the jam line.

Illegally Blonde can hold her own against even the best blockers. (Photo by Axle Adams)

Some of you might know about my slight obsession with Wreck Deckard and how excited I get when she lines up on the jam line, but Illegally Blonde might give her a run for her money. Blondie is extraordinarily talented and agile. I have yet to see a bout where she’s not jumping the apex, riding the inside line on one leg to get past the last few blockers, or jumping over obstacles on the track. Seriously. Her athleticism is insane and I wouldn’t be surprised to see her on WOJ very soon.

Anyway, back to the bout. I didn’t take too many notes, because the High Rollers performed consistently like always. That and I was getting side-tracked with thoughts of after-bout tacos at the Cruzroom Bar. But seriously, there’s not a lot to say about the High Rollers other than they are one of the most consistent teams I’ve seen. They’ve got their shit together and it shows.

Can someone say repeat RCR champions?